An’s shop was struggling, so after Binh left, she told me to quit completely. Up here, I’m like a “crippled” person; without a motorbike, I don’t know how to find work.
This month I don’t even have money to pay rent. Even though the landlady felt sorry for me, she had to tell me some bad news: “I feel so sorry for your situation, but you see, so many people are unemployed. The economy is tough, so I try to earn whatever I can. Please understand, darling.”
Everywhere I went to apply for a job, they said the same thing. I didn’t have much education, but I understood the meaning of “economic hardship.” I could have stayed at the house next door, but half a month ago he announced he had a new girlfriend and was moving in.
As I packed my things, I felt utterly defeated. I thought I’d finally found a stable job to support my family, but it seems I’m about to return to my hometown and become a burden.
That evening, I asked Ms. An for directions to the bus station to buy a ticket home. After she gave me the directions, I said goodbye to my roommate and grabbed my backpack to go find a motorbike taxi. After walking quite a distance, I finally saw a motorbike taxi driver waiting for customers. He greeted me warmly: “Where are you going? Back home?”
I nodded: “To the bus station. How much will it cost to get there?”
Seeing it was getting late, he didn’t hesitate to quote a price: “It’s quite far, but I’ll give you fifty thousand dong to get there!”
I felt dizzy. I only had two hundred thousand dong left in my pocket; fifty thousand dong was barely enough to buy a ticket home.
I asked again: “I’m out of money, sir. Can you give me a discount?”
The driver said, “Look around, the motorbike taxis are all going home now, there aren’t many people driving around. I’ve already given you a cheap price; if you met someone else, they’d charge you more!”
I had no choice but to get on. And it’s true, if I didn’t take this trip, I might not have another one to choose from.
Once I got on, I realized that although the driver looked old, his motorbike was even older. It made a whining sound every time he twisted the throttle, and even in first gear, it felt as weak as in fourth.
I prayed to God for a safe journey to my destination. But it seemed God was too high to hear my prayers.
Suddenly, the motorbike broke down. The driver pulled over to the side of the road and said, “The motorbike broke down halfway. Give me some money to get it repaired, and I’ll come back to pick you up, okay?”
I shook my head, “What if you leave me here? How will I know the way home?”
I was standing on a large bridge. I didn’t know if it was usually crowded, but there wasn’t a soul in sight.
My uncle said, “What do we do now, son? If you don’t give me money to get it repaired, we’ll both be stuck here until late at night!”
Confused, I replied, “Just take me to the repair shop, and after it’s fixed, you can drop me off at the bus station, and I’ll pay you.”
He growled, “So you’re not going to give me the money now?”
I answered, “Go get it repaired, I’ll give you enough money later!”
He pushed the bike across the road, glancing over at me. Just as I was about to run after him to the repair shop, he suddenly yelled, “Damn it, if you don’t give me the money, you dog!”
After saying that, he sped off, leaving me standing there dumbfounded.
Luckily, I wasn’t naive enough to be easily fooled, otherwise I might have lost even more money.
But now I’m stuck here, not even knowing where I am because all I see are dense trees, no house or shelter.
I reluctantly grabbed my belongings and headed in the direction the man had sped off. After a considerable distance, the sky grew darker, and I grew increasingly frightened. Perhaps instead of taking me to the bus station, he had taken me to a secluded spot to extort money.
I trembled as I walked, surrounded only by bushes and the sounds of frogs. Suddenly, a car’s headlights stopped in the distance, coming from the opposite direction. I ran towards it as fast as I could, as if grasping at a straw for survival.
The young man had stopped to urinate. As I got closer, I saw the hard, erect penis between his legs, splashing water onto the grass with a rustling sound. Seeing me approach, he didn’t even bother to put away his goods. I stopped and turned away, waiting for him to finish.
I softly called out, “Ah, sir…”
He had a cigarette in his mouth. After urinating, he shook his penis dry and replied, “Lost, aren’t you? Or did that motorbike taxi driver drop you off here?” I wondered how he could have guessed, but then I felt the voice sounded so familiar. That compelled me to turn around and get a good look. Under the car’s headlights, I could make out about five-tenths of his face.
But that was enough for me to recognize him. It was none other than the man who had nearly killed Lùi.
Hoang’s words from that day still echoed in my head: “Wherever I see you, I’ll stab you all to death.”
I didn’t have time to say anything more; I swerved across the road and ran as fast as I could. I was afraid he had a knife, and I was already quite exhausted.
As I predicted, Hoang jumped into his car and sped off in pursuit. Knowing I had no chance of escaping, I turned around, intending to fight him to the death.
Unexpectedly, Hoang caught up and asked, “Why are you running so fast? I’m the one who’s here, not you!” “What’s with all this fear of the sea ghost?”
I replied, “You’re a devil, not a ghost! You want to stab me, don’t you? Put the knife down and fight me one-on-one, you dog!”
Hoang grimaced at me, displaying an expression of utter helplessness. He clicked his tongue, “Are you crazy? I was just a young hooligan back then, I don’t stab or slash anyone anymore. Get in the car, old man, we’ll be screwed if we run out of gas.”
I was stunned, “I thought you were going to chase after me and stab me?”
Hoang turned the car around and said, “I was so crazy, man. I’ve reformed now, dad.”
After some back and forth, I finally climbed onto the back of his motorbike. I had no choice.
After talking for a while, I learned that Hoang, after leaving Can Tho, had wandered around, finally settling in Saigon as a porter through a mutual acquaintance. He had changed a lot, perhaps at least he was no longer idle, using his penis to buy an easy life like before.
Hoang asked, “How’s Lui doing?”
I replied, “He’s completely recovered. Now he’s working in the fields back home.”
I asked again, “Did you work with Tan?”
Hoang sighed, paused for a moment, then replied, “He’s dead.”
I was shocked to hear this. Although I hated both of them, I wasn’t happy to hear this news. They were bad people, but it was all just the impulsiveness of youth.
I quietly asked, “What happened?”
Hoang replied, “I was stabbed, and he shielded me. The knife was rusted, and we didn’t know. We went to the pharmacy to buy hydrogen peroxide, cotton swabs, and antiseptic to bandage it up haphazardly. A few days later, I went to work, and he stayed home, got a severe infection, and died.”
I was speechless. It turned out that Hoang’s change of heart was also due to this incident. I didn’t know what to say, so I just patted his shoulder to comfort him.
Hoang took a deep breath and said a few words full of reflection: “It’s also because we disregarded life and death. Only when we actually died did we know what fear was. When Tan died, I didn’t even have money to arrange his funeral. People around us hated us so much, it was hard to find anyone to help us.”
“Living in this world, and even when you die, no one feels sorry for you. It’s depressing, isn’t it?”
“Back then, when I stabbed Lui, he had friends who took him to the hospital, borrowing money and taking care of everything.” “As for Tan, he was stabbed, the wound became infected, he had seizures, and all I could do was watch him lie there and suffer.”
“What’s the point of living if no one cares for you?”
I was happy that he said these things, but also sad that he realized this too late.
Turning back is the way to salvation, but not everyone knows how to turn back in time.
Hoang drove me for a while before we saw any houses, and I breathed a sigh of relief. I asked, “Is this far from the bus station?”
Hoang pulled into a shop to buy two boxes of rice. While waiting for the food, he said, “It’s very far. That motorbike taxi driver drove in the opposite direction from the bus station all the way down here. I occasionally encounter people like that on my way home from work.”
Hanging the two boxes of rice on the motorbike, Hoang said, “Come to my house to sleep tonight, and take a bus home in the morning. Otherwise, if you take a motorbike taxi and run into that guy again, you’ll end up dead on the street, son.”
I was a little worried, wondering if the whole story was just Hoàng making up to lure me back home. What if, in the middle of the night while I was sound asleep, he stabbed me a few times and disposed of my body without anyone knowing?
Seeing my hesitation, Hoàng said, “You’re afraid I’ll stab you, aren’t you? Damn it, if I wanted to, I’d have stabbed you earlier and thrown you into the bushes in the middle of the field. No one would even see you dead by then, let alone bring you home for everyone to see.”
Well, maybe he had a point. But Hoàng didn’t seem like a devious person. Even when he was bad before, he was the type to wear his heart on his sleeve.
Back at the boarding house, Hoàng asked me to give my ID card to the landlord. He added, “This guy is terrified of you killing him. Keep this paper, if he’s still alive tomorrow, give it back to him. If he’s dead tomorrow, take it to the police station and have them arrest me.”
The landlord looked elderly, his hair streaked with gray and his eyes full of wrinkles. He said, “Don’t worry, son, Hoang is the kindest boy in the neighborhood. You got lost, didn’t you? The others were just like you, nothing happened, don’t worry.”
Entering Hoang’s room, I was startled to see an altar near the bathroom. On it was an incense burner and a photograph of Tan, the man who had saved Hoang’s life. Tan was an orphan with no one to worship him, so Hoang, fearing his friend would be left alone, kept it simple.
Besides the altar, there seemed to be nothing else in Hoang’s house except a few sets of clothes hanging on a clothesline, a bowl, a spoon, and a pair of chopsticks lying haphazardly on the kitchen counter.
It’s true that this man had reformed, but his laziness was something he could never shake off.
Hoang placed a lunchbox on the altar and lit incense, praying, “Come home and eat, Tan!”
After finishing, he headed towards the bathroom and said to me, “Eat your meal. That box is for you. I’ll eat the one on the altar after the offerings are made.”
I nodded in thanks, and suddenly wondered how Lùi, Nhí, and Đậu would react if they heard about this.
After I finished eating, Hoàng had also finished showering. Since I had to sleep here tonight, I decided to shower too. The bathroom was bare except for the faucet, a hanger, and a laundry basin. The clothes were just washed away. The underwear that Hoang had hung on the hook was still there. As soon as I closed the door, the pungent smell filled the room.
But strangely, I didn’t find it smelly at all; on the contrary, it was incredibly stimulating. I moved closer to the dirty clothes and looked at the stretched-out underwear that Hoang had hung there. The underwear smelled very strong, especially from the white stains on it, even though it had dried and hardened.
I took a deep breath, and the smell of men’s underwear immediately assaulted my nostrils. My penis instantly became erect, because I had never smelled anything so stimulating before. Actually, I’ve had sex many times, but I always took off all my clothes. I never thought that sweaty underwear could be so incredibly stimulating.
I took the underwear off, sniffing it while masturbating. The new, exhilarating sensation made my penis feel like it was about to explode. If Hoang knew I did this to his underwear, he’d probably throw me out.
I was high when Hoang suddenly knocked on the door: “What were you doing masturbating in there for so long? Hurry up so I can wash my hands.”
I jumped like a thief caught red-handed, and because of that, semen spurted out of my penis in bursts. Unfortunately, the semen spurted into the toilet bowl, the splashing sound echoing intermittently, making Hoang outside laugh heartily.
When I finished showering and came out, Hoang teased me: “So, did you get high enough just now? You ejaculated so much!”
I blushed with embarrassment. Luckily, he didn’t know I was sniffing his underwear, otherwise I wouldn’t know where to hide it.
The room was tiny, even smaller than my previous room. That night, Hoang cleaned up quickly and then lay down flat on the floor.
I asked: “Aren’t you sleeping on a mat?”
Hoang replied: “It’s too hot. It’s cooler on the tiles.”
I said: “Oh, I don’t feel hot at all! I’m wearing a shirt and I’m still cold!”
Hoang replied, “Try lying here and masturbating, the floor tiles will get hot like you soon, so don’t think it’s cold.”
I forgot, a young man like him alone would definitely masturbate. At that moment, my body was noticeably hot, so it was understandable that I didn’t feel cool enough.
Suddenly, Hoang asked, “Hey, are you gay?”
I froze, then denied, “No, I’m not.”
Hoang said, “Liar. If you’re not gay, why did you touch my underwear?”
I was too embarrassed to say anything. Hoang added, “Next time you take someone’s underwear down, look carefully before hanging it back up. You masturbate in someone’s underwear and then say you’re not gay.”
It turned out Hoang had suspected it all along, he just deliberately hung the underwear there to test me. I never expected to fall for it.
I replied, “Yes, I’m gay. If you hate it, I’ll go sleep on the park bench outside the guesthouse now.”
Hoang explained, “I was just asking, I wasn’t making a fuss.”
I was so embarrassed I turned my back to Hoang, not daring to breathe heavily as if afraid he’d notice my presence.
After a while, Hoang asked, “Hey, are you on top or on the bottom? But from what I guess… you’re on the bottom, right?”
His words were like a gust of wind from the depths of the earth, chilling me to the bone. A dark-skinned, muscular country boy, and yet he was being seen as the bottom.
Seeing my silence, Hoang asked again, “Right?”
I was so embarrassed, I just mumbled, “Um!”
Hoang suddenly sat up, nudged me, and said, “So… can you… let me… have sex with you?”
I sat up too, unsure if it was a dream or reality. I asked again, my voice almost shouting, “Huh? What? What did you say?”
Hoang mumbled, “Well, if you don’t want to have sex, then fine, why are you making such a fuss?”
So I didn’t mishear, he really wanted to do it with me.
I wondered, “What? Really? You hated gays so much, didn’t you?”
Hoang clicked his tongue, “That was in the past. Now I’m desperate. I’ll sleep with whoever I can get, I’m not picky anymore.”
I laughed and said, “So, were any of the guys you brought here gay?”
Hoang replied, “I saved five people, you’re only the second gay one. Last time, that gay guy was really horny. I was sleeping and he secretly sat on my dick. When I woke up, I saw him thrusting, saying he was repaying me for saving him. And I felt so good that I let him keep thrusting…”
Seeing his serious face, I burst out laughing. Gone was the arrogant, tough guy he was a year or two ago.
I teased, “Then why didn’t you wait until later? Maybe I’d climb on your dick and thrust too?”
Hoang shook his head: “No! You already masturbated earlier, it would be a shame if you slept with me tonight…”
I chuckled and asked, “Do you have any condoms?”
Hoang hurriedly sat up and pulled out a condom from his wallet, saying, “They gave me a few during some training at work. I thought I wouldn’t use them, but…”
I took the condom from his hand and gestured for him to lie down. I reached up to his crotch and squeezed his groin, discovering that he wasn’t actually erect at all.
I pulled his pants down and started licking his nipples. Hoang gasped, even though his penis hadn’t started to get hard yet.
It’s true that straight guys are quite different from gay men. Getting Hoang to get an erection was quite a struggle for me. I sucked his nipples for a while, and Hoang’s penis was only half-erect, even though he had been moaning non-stop.
After sucking his nipples, I moved on to sucking his penis. His penis was only half-erect, but when I took it in, my mouth was already full. I gently pulled the base of his penis to expose the glans, then took it into my mouth and rubbed it with my tongue.
Hoang trembled slightly. I swallowed his whole dick. As I sucked faster and faster, Hoang suddenly exclaimed, “Oh my god, it feels so good… Gay guys suck dick better than girls… They only suck for a little while and then complain their mouths are tired… Mmm… My dick head is numb…”
I released his dick and licked along its shaft, my tongue sweeping Hoang’s small testicles into my mouth and continuously massaging them. Hoang arched his back and moaned, his teeth clenched as he gasped for air.
I teased, “Let’s just leave it like this and go to sleep. We’ll continue tomorrow morning.”
Hoang cursed, “You bitch, just kill me already! My dick is so hard it can’t get down to this size, how can I sleep?”
I joked, “Well, you’re the one who’s horny, not me! I’m going to sleep.”
Hoang grimaced, “I beg you! What do you want me to do for you to let me fuck you?”
I teased him further, “Whatever makes you horny, then I’ll let you fuck me!”
Hoang Hoang clicked his tongue, frowned, and grimaced for a moment before deciding to bury his face in my asshole and suck it. His movements were clumsy, but just thinking about being sucked by a straight guy was enough to make my dick hard as a rock.
I said, “See my asshole? Spit some saliva in it.”
Hoang lifted my butt and spat in, then asked, “And then what?”
I said, “Put your finger in. Just one finger.”
Hoang grimaced, “Damn, that’s dirty…”
I shrugged, “If it’s dirty, then let’s not have sex.”
Hoang pressed his stomach and inserted one finger. Actually, I had cleaned myself thoroughly earlier, so there was a high chance there wouldn’t be any problems.
Hoang’s finger touched the wall of my anus, stimulating me, and my anal muscles tightened around his finger. Hoang looked at me excitedly, “Hey, it feels so good when it tightens… It feels so good… No wonder it’s so pleasurable…”
Hoang continued to thrust his finger in and out of my asshole like a toy. After a while, I said, “Okay, you can put your dick in now.”
Hoang’s face lit up with joy. He immediately flipped me over and tried to insert his penis. I asked, “Do you like this position?”
Hoang replied, “No, it’s not that. I’m a little scared. Damn it, you’re lying underneath and your dick is even bigger than mine. I was both scared and embarrassed, so I just flipped over already…”
Hoang lay on top of me after inserting his penis. He moaned softly, “It’s so warm… Ah… It’s squeezing… It’s squeezing… Damn, it feels so good… It’s been so long since I’ve been fucked…”
After saying that, Hoang started thrusting his penis, gently and slowly, savoring the feeling he hadn’t experienced in a long time.
Hoang lay there thrusting for a long time, moaning, “It feels so good… So good…”, even wanting to stay like that until morning.
I threatened, “Hurry up, it’ll stretch out and it won’t feel this good anymore.”
Hoang replied, “Whatever, as long as it’s warm.”
I struggled, “But you’re pressing down on me too hard! I’ll probably die lying like this until morning.”
Hearing this, Hoang flipped me over, letting me lie on top of him while he thrust his penis underneath. It’s truly unbelievable how deprived someone must be to be so reluctant to “eat” when they finally get to.
Seeing Hoang’s suffering, I said, “Just finish this, I’ll let you have another round tomorrow morning. How can I sleep like this all the time, how can I go to work tomorrow?”
Hoang asked, “Really? Then another round tomorrow morning, okay?”
With my suggestion, Hoang eagerly thrust his penis again, as was his nature. He gestured for me to kneel on the floor, while he thrust his penis into my buttocks from behind, making a loud slapping sound that could be heard outside the room.
In the final few thrusts, Hoang whispered, “It feels so good, man… I’m about to come… My dick feels so good… I’m coming… I’m coming… Mmm… Mmm… Mmm…”
And so, Hoang ejaculated inside me. Even through the condom, the semen was still hot like boiling water just taken off the heat.
Hoang rolled over, panting, the condom full of semen still hanging from his still erect penis.
Hoang clicked his tongue, “Maybe I’m gay and I don’t know it, man? Because I feel like playing with gay men is more pleasurable than playing with women back then.”
I explained, “That’s not it. Back then, you could have it whenever you wanted, you didn’t appreciate it. They call it ‘eating until you’re full.’ But now it’s rare to get it, so it’s understandable that it’s more pleasurable.”
Hoang nodded, not forgetting to remind me, “You said you’d let me have another go tomorrow morning, remember? If you break your promise, I’ll take you back to that place where we left you earlier.”
As promised, the next morning Hoang woke up very early just to have sex with me. But the day after tomorrow was the weekend, so he begged me to stay and let him have sex with me one more day.
Knowing that I was unemployed and had chosen to go back to my hometown, Hoang said, “Just stay in my room and find a job. When you find one, you can work. Otherwise, just stay here and I’ll take care of your two meals a day!”
I didn’t doubt him because he kept his word. Like the thing he said before, “I’ll have sex with you when I see you,” no matter how much I tried to avoid him, I couldn’t escape him now.